Polar (2019): A Loud, Dumb Assassin Fantasy—Saved by Surprisingly Excellent Audio Description
I just finished watching Polar (2019), Netflix’s hyper-stylized assassin flick starring Mads Mikkelsen as Duncan Vizla, a legendary hitman being pushed into retirement—permanently. And I walked away with two very different takeaways.
One is about the movie itself.
The other is about accessibility, equality, and why blind audiences deserve the full experience—including sex, bodies, and eroticism—without being treated like fragile children.
Let’s start with the movie.
First Impression: Style Over Sense
Polar wants desperately to be taken seriously, but it never earns that respect. At its core, it feels like a cheap knockoff of John Wick and Kill Bill—all the surface cool with none of the discipline, logic, or emotional weight.
The character motivations are especially ridiculous.
The big question that never stops bothering me:
Why would you go after your most legendary, efficient assassin just to save money?
That’s not ruthless.
That’s not clever.
That’s just bad business.
If your top asset is that effective, lethal, and vengeful, trying to eliminate him makes you look like an idiot, not a mastermind. And okay, I can buy that the guy in charge may be an idiot, but all the other people working for him? Oh well, keep reading- they're idiots too.
The “Elite” Hitmen Are… Morons
Aside from Duncan, every other hitman in this movie is portrayed as a coked-up, perfume-spraying, party-addicted clown. They surround themselves with sex workers, do drugs openly, and generally behave like walking liabilities.
So when they get wiped out, it doesn’t feel like Duncan is especially brilliant—it just feels like his enemies are profoundly stupid.
That’s not tension.
That’s natural selection.
Action Without Imagination
Let’s talk action—because for an assassin movie, this is where things really fall flat.
Yes, the usual rules apply:
- The good guy hits everything.
- The bad guys can’t hit shit.
- Plot armor is thicker than body armor.
But beyond that?
There’s nothing impressive here.
No flashy martial arts.
No memorable gunplay.
No creative stunts.
No choreography that makes you sit up and go, “Damn.”
And then there’s the moment that completely broke my suspension of disbelief:
What kind of supposedly elite, PTSD-ridden hitman wakes up and accidentally kills his own dog?
What.
The.
Fuck.
That’s not tragic.
That’s just insulting to the character.
Now the Good—And This Matters More Than the Movie
This is where Polar unexpectedly redeems itself.
Because I watched the film using audio description, and the audio description for this movie is hands-down the best I’ve ever encountered in an action film.
Audio Description Done Right—Including Sex
All Erotic Scenes from Polar (2019) (Don't go here if you're under 18!
Most described movies completely sanitize sex scenes. You’ll get something like:
“Later, they’re having sex.”
And that’s it. No bodies. No movement. No intimacy.
Polar did the opposite.
The describer actually described:
- Position changes
- Nudity
- Breasts, asses, bodies in motion
- At one point, explicitly noting “her big-nipple breasts pressed to the window”
That is extraordinary.
Not because I’m “looking for audio porn” (okay—maybe sometimes, but that’s not the point), but because this is what real accessibility looks like.
Audio Described Porn for the Blin
Stop Censoring Blind People
As someone who has spent his life fighting for advocacy, equality, and equal access for blind people, this matters deeply to me.
There’s this quiet, condescending belief that:
- Blind people can’t handle sex
- Blind people shouldn’t hear explicit descriptions
- Blind audiences need to be “protected”
Grow up.
Blind people are just people without eyesight.
We still want stimulation.
We still enjoy eroticism.
We still like sex—often a lot of it.
If sighted audiences get the full experience—the bodies, the desire, the raw intimacy—then denying that to blind audiences is not protection. It’s discrimination.
Polar—of all movies—got this right.
And for that alone, it deserves recognition.
[NSFW?] Questions about erotica for the visually impaired. : r/Blind
Final Verdict
Polar is not a smart movie.
It’s not a deep movie.
It’s barely a competent action film.
But its audio description sets a gold standard that other productions should be studying and copying immediately.
If you care about accessibility, representation, and real equality—not the sanitized, patronizing version—this movie accidentally does something important.
And that’s worth talking about.
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#PolarMovie #AudioDescription #BlindAccessibility #DisabilityAdvocacy #EqualAccess #FilmCriticism #NetflixReview #BlindCreators #SexAndDisability #RepresentationMatters
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